Dear Amber, Khloe, Kanye, Tyga and Kylie

Dear Amber, Khole, Kanye, Tyga and Kylie,

2 chyle

While you all have attempted the first group shade the internet and entertainment news cycle these past weeks, I’m not sure what it really accomplished except to expose all of your collective business. I realize there is all sorts of hate and bad blood between most of you but guess what? Who the fuck really cares? None of you are curing cancer. None of you are making any significant difference in the lives of anyone outside of the social media search engine developers finding new ways to create traffic to your social media accounts.

Harsh yes, but while I’m a pretty live let live kinda woman, this bullshit here (and its bullshit) is giving me a fucking headache. With the exception of Kylie Jenner (she’s a minor) the rest of you are way too fucking old for this shit. Did any of you graduate from high school? The shade being thrown is so beyond anything that makes sense. How can you be mad at someone who made a sex tape when you been stripping and have probably done a lot worse, not on camera, for and because someone was PAYING you? Just because you “own it” doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. And please don’t give me that, “I was a stripper with morals” speech. Stripping by definition and practice means that you will do WHATEVER to WHOMEVER is paying. The fact that you felt the need to provide for your family indicates a level of dysfunction in your living conditions that are sad and painful. That was not your responsibility to provide for your family. You were a minor. Your “decision” to strip wasn’t yours to make, as you were not legally allowed to do so. This means that those clubs you danced in, those after-hours clubs you danced in, those men whose laps you danced on, and all the various things you did until you were 18 years old with whomever , they were complicit in child sex trafficking. Let’s be clear on THAT for a moment.

So perhaps when you made reference to Kylie Jenner & Tyga’s “friendship” I’m sure you were coming from a place of ‘been there/done that’, so you recognized that game.

However, the proper way to handle your view on that situation would have been to contact the police ASAP, if Kylie’s mother doesn’t seem too concerned about the issues or these people as Kanye has started talking (per the tabloids and confirmed Tyga’s & Kylie’s ‘relationship)

I understand that Tyga is your friend’s baby-daddy BUT he ain’t yours. Your friend needs to co-parent with him, just as YOU need to learn to co-parent with your soon-to-be ex husband Wiz. She can speak for herself. Your being her ‘savior’ isn’t a good look for her. I understand your friend Blac Chyna is but hurt but this is not the first time and it won’t be the last a man will hurt her feelings. And yours either.

Oh and videos you keep posting are not helping your cause either. You don’t have much room to talk about Kim and HER video (ONE) when you are posting this and this types of videos online. So because it’s not a man involved it’s okay?

While I am NOT a Kim K fan, and for the record, I’ve never seen the video, I don’t think she and Ray J made that video thinking they would be on From all account, it was 2 consenting adults making a private video, like MOST celebrity videos are (with exception to that silly ass Mimi Faust bathroom swinging porn fiasco). What she did in the video isn’t what THOUSANDS if not MILLIONS of women have done for their own man IN PRIVATE behind CLOSED doors, including a man jacking off on their faces AND getting peed on. I am not going to judge anyone’s kink (unless it involves minor and animals).

That being said, When you come for someone’s sibling, don’t act surprised when they come for you. That’s what Khloe did. And I don’t think too many other woman would not have done the same thing. If this wasn’t a celebrity thing, she would have come for you in different way, which would have involved the police, her and her BFFs and possible hospitalization.

Khloe, I know you are very protective of your family and your family’s reality shows do indicate how much you love them but IF in fact your youngest sister and Tyga do have something going on, you should check that and quick. A mid 20- something man SHOULD NOT be ‘friends’ with still in high school no matter how you slice it. I am sure your sister is a lovely young woman but this is about being age-appropriate and setting healthy boundaries. This friendship is clearly not. If this was either one of YOUR nieces, you would have put paws on this dude like yesterday. I don’t doubt that your sister has her shit together or is doing her thing (whatever it is) in Hollywood

In case any of you DID NOT KNOW (or those high-powered attorneys you hired didn’t tell you).


So, given Tyga’s interviews and pictures of your sister Kylie and Tyga and social media, I wouldn’t be surprised if your mom Kris gets a surprise visit from state authorities.

What makes outsiders think this is ‘creepy’ and inappropriate is the fact that, despite your high regard for your baby sister, she’s still a minor. We all know minors make some fucked up-life altering decisions (as well as young adults) and being involved with a GROWN ASS MAN who is at least 25 years old is an unacceptable period. I don’t care if he is a ‘family friend’. It is flat-out inappropriate and reeks of manipulation. What possible companionship can your sister offer to a man with a child? Besides sex and money? So is TYGA worth $4 million dollars as your 17-year-old sister is reportedly worth?

Can HE provide for your sister to the lifestyle to which she was raised? So tell me (and everyone else) what type of mental stimulation can she provide when her life experience has been reality television since she was 11 YEARS OLD and is home-schooled?

I’ll wait.


Your punk ass needs to quit. Going on radio pretending that white people and black people are so fundamentally polar opposite that we can’t agree on basis shit. Like how RKellyish you are at the moment

Kylie Jenner is SEVENTEEN YEARS OLD. You were born BEFORE Ms. Jenner. There is a difference between dating a woman who was born in 1989 and woman who was born in 1997. As you are a California Native, I will remind YOU that the age of consent is 18 in the state of California Those social media pictures of you too all cuddled up and hanging . Dude, so not a good look. Let’s be clear here. What flies in Hollywood, The hip-hop circles you run in and all that other BS you hang around, just because you and those of your ‘ilk don’t think ‘dating’ under age young girls is problematic does not mean the rest of us in “Middle America” do not. For all the pontificating on the subject, most people of rational decision-making individuals who are 18 years or older see this for what it is, a 20 something year old single man with a child and ex baby-momma fucking around with a 17-year-old.

Did I leave out anything?

Lest I forget, California has a different approach to adult men having “relationships” with younger women. I would suggest that you start looking into retaining a California Defense attorney who specializes in sex crimes.

Kanye, I’m going to need you to get off the internet for about 10 years. I understand your mother’s death took a part of your soul, but acting like you are butt hurt constantly, well. It’s not a good look. You are tired of cameras in your face. I can imagine but guess what? Talk to celebrities who DO NOT have cameras in their faces all the time. Let them give YOU tips on how to have a life away from the spotlight. Do you realize that there are some celebrities who are NOT fodder for the tabloids? They have much respect in their creative circles and within the general public? When they do show up for award shows, dinner and events, people are actually, genuinely HAPPY to see them? You might want to try meeting with them (in private) because whomever your PR people/BRANDING people are, they are not doing a good job.

As far as Amber goes, by your own admission, she was a placeholder for your now wife. Again, just because she (Amber was your busy station) until the love of your life became available does not mean she is not worthy of respect. For the time you spent together you sported her on your arm to EVERY EVENT known to man while you were together. If the stories are to be believed, you even PAID her after your breakup. Now, I have yet to pay anyone I have broken up with anything but wishing them a broken leg, you sir, paid said ex stripper a million? or more???

Aright Then.

Regardless of how and why you and Amber broke up, it ended. Move on. While I realize she came for your young sister-in-law, you have enough lawyers on speed dial to put a kibosh on her mouth. I can only hope you had some built-in keep your mouth shut clause built-in to your settlement with Ms. Rose, or else you paid your lawyers way too much money for their services.

I will also add this. Tyga is too fucking old to be messing with Kylie. Grow a pair and treat her as if she was YOUR daughter NORTH. Take his ass outside and handle him like a man. If you can swing on cameramen for getting to close to your wife and daughter, Tyga shouldn’t be much of a stretch.

Kylie, while I’m sure you think you are GROWN, young lady, you are NOT. I understand that you are trying to make a place in the world for yourself and us ‘regular’ people just don’t understand. You are right, we don’t. That’s because we haven’t had cameras in our faces since we were children. Look at some of the Hollywood stars who HAVE had cameras in their faces since they were a child. Their young adult years haven’t always been pleasant, even with two parents.

I know you probably believe that your ‘friendship’ with Tyga is all that, but let’s look at it for what it is. A 20 something year old man is keeping you company. You are not even old enough to be in most bars after a certain period of the evening. And drinking? Most established probably only allow you because they want the free air time of one of your clan’s shows. While your mother may let you drink at home, guess what, doing it outside of there is ILLEGAL. While you may be famous, no ONE is trying to lose their livelihood over you. And no sweetheart, you can’t afford to pay for ALL the lawsuits that will come your way if you drunk-drive and hurt or kill someone. While you may be famous, no ONE is trying to lose their livelihood over you. And no sweetheart, you can’t afford to pay for ALL the lawsuits that will come your way if you drunk-drive and hurt or kill someone.

I understand that you think that this is your ‘life’ and your ‘business’ and you should be able to live your life any way you want. You are right. When you are 18, feel free. You have until August 10 to be a guest in your parent’s home, and then you can bolt the very next day, since you decided home school isn’t going to keep you away from your ‘career’. Your childhood ends at 18 legally unless you have been emancipated by the courts. Maybe you have done this, maybe not but trust and believe, outside of your Jenner/Kardashian clan bubble, the world is a very different place. Men exploit young women and men like yourself for snacks daily. In some instances, your family’s reputation will harm you more than do you good. I could list a million Hollywood stores of men who have eaten alive young women like yourself and how it affected them to the end of their lives. While Amber Rose wasn’t exactly tactful in her commentary about your friendship with Tyga, there as a valid point to what she said. He has no business being around you, ‘friend’ or not.

While you may consider yourself grown, physically, developmentally and emotionally you are not. While you have the financial resources to do whatever you want at 17, many of those watching you on the shows you are on do not. You are a role model in some circles, whether you like it or not. While you see nothing wrong with your friendship with Tyga, some young girl is under the impression that if you can do it, so can she. So SHE will seek out relationships with older men, who unlike Tyga, will not have her best interest in mind. Would you like to understand why many woman and men are up in arms about your friendship, try googling teen pregnancy statistics? Did you know that many young women are impregnated by men who are over 20, somewhere in the area of like over 50% OR MORE? Men who are OVER 20 are impregnating young women 18 AND YOUNGER every day in this country.

While you have the financial resources to hire a nanny (or 2) have 3-4 baby showers, buy yourself a new house for you and your baby and NEVER worry about how you will pay for it all. Those young girls who are emulating you? They don’t have Kim, Khloe or Kourtney or even your mom to pay for the things they need on a daily basis to take care of their children. They won’t have your brothers to play with their child while they are at an ‘event’ or awards show to be seen. Do you even know what it’s like to have to choose between your children having milk or you have your cell phone working? Do you know what it’s like to have the father of your child deny he’s the father and refuse ANY contact with your or your child or pay any support to said child?

No, you will NEVER know that way of life.

If you want to know how you WILL be treated by Tyga in the future, all you have to do is look at Blac Chyna.
Do not for one second believe that he will treat you different. He will not. While he’s hugged up with you, did it ever occur to you that he should be spending time with his son, that’s when he’s not in the ‘studio’ or making appearances or in concert?

Please tell me what you talk about? I mean what type of serious conversations do you have with a 20 something year old man? Politics? 401(k) s, clothes? Obamacare? Please tell us what types of conversations do you have with this man? Because I’m speak for everyone when I say that your conversations are of a limited nature. Despite your families’ reality show circle, you do not have the life-experiences of a 25-26 year old woman, you just do not. Nothing you can say will make most people feel different. For that matter ask most 25-26 year old women if they are even DATING the same man they were dating when they were 17 years old and they will grimace in embarrassment. They will tell you that they are a different person at 17 than they are now and their dating habits and lifestyles have changed drastically (if they have matured on any level)

AND they are finally seeing the impact of their life-decisions from their short-term and long-term decision from that age.

When YOU become 25-26, YOU will not be the same person you are today. Your life will not be the same in many areas, including your parents.

What Amber said (as fucked up as it was) was because SHE has been where you are right now, except she didn’t have anyone looking out for her best interest. She didn’t have any adult in her life to say. NO, this behavior and these influences are unacceptable in your life AND do something about it. Whether it was to call the police or just remove her physically from the situation.

As you get older you will learn that sometimes, it’s not the messenger but the message you should be paying attention to.

at some point the bullshit gotta stop


letter to my ex boyfriends

I want to thank you. Yes, i know, you are waiting for the punch line, or the punch, but you won’t get either. Not that a couple of you don’t deserve being punched in the gonads for certain specific actions (but i won’t go there, my brother’s don’t need any more reasons to hate you) but i’m not going to send anyone after you. In fact, this letter is about closure, in all its various forms. 


At various points I like, cared about deeply and loved in various ways, each of you. What i felt for you then was real, but today, i would have a hard time verbalizing why. The “Me” then love, liked, cared for the “YOU” then. Now, totally different story. While love doesn’t die, it definitely does fade away. 


I am not the same person I was when I dated you. Whether i was 16 or 26 or 36, the person you knew then is not the person standing before you now. She is older, wiser and much sexier. She is an handful, to be sure, but she’s is sure about what it takes to win her heart, her mind, her body and her soul now.

A promise won’t do anything. Money, Trips, Concerts, Plays, Events, Romantic Dinners? um, sorry, I do that for myself, so again, WHY would I need you? What i’m looking for in a person i want to be with now is MUCH different from when i was with you. What are you bringing to the table is a whole different level now. I appreciate you for helping me realize that.

You guys have taught me that I have to love me more than I love you, because in the end, I will be there, you will not. Not that i didn’t love you (for the most part i did) but that self-encompassing, all inclusive, waking up in the morning glad to be alive feeling should have been for myself, not you. The reasons I didn’t are well known to you and I so i don’t have to rehash them here. Suffice to say, every day i wake up now, i’m happy and thrilled, for myself. Over the years i realized this saying to be true


“Hurt People Hurt People”

Sometimes i thought that you didn’t mean to hurt me, but when i look back, a couple of you really did mean to hurt me. While not physically (you knew I’d kill you swiftly if you touched me) but emotionally or mentally, but you figured that hurting me  was the best way. Most times you didn’t succeed, a few times you did, in glorious fashion and on public display. In those instances, my most public embarrassments, i realized, this isn’t love. This is about control, anger, rage and your own hurt, because you ‘perceived’ I “hurt” you, real or imagined. You thought breaking me down would make you feel better. Sometimes it did, for a bit, then you tried to apologize. Not because you meant the apology but because your bed was cold or the other woman really wasn’t all you thought she was. If i accepted your apology, you viewed my acceptance as weakness and acted accordingly. If i didn’t accept you apology, all I did (in your mind) was reaffirm how ‘mean’ I was. Catch-22 right?

What i learned then and now was that it wasn’t about you. It was about me. It was about me being able to determine “Friend or Foe”, who was worthy to be in my life and who wasn’t and WHO should be on the stage of life with me, in the front row cheering me on, in the balcony, at the ticket counter or standing outside on the sidewalk. 

Honestly, some of you i should have never dated. You and I didn’t have anything in common, except for lust in some cases. Some of you were right, I really was too smart for you, too kind for you, too funny for you, too ambitious for you, too everything for you. Good looking out, even if i didn’t realize it then, I do now.

You were meant to be in my life for a reason. To learn something about myself (while i would have preferred to learn in via READING it in a book) I realized what I DO NOT WANT in a man. I so appreciate that! Dating you really turned out to be the best thing i never had. I never had to get divorced. I never have to deal with you and child support or custody issues. I don’t have to change my name, I don’t have to deal with ANY of your family members and I don’t have to worry about EVER having to talk to you again if i chose to do so. I like that best of all.

I’m not bitter or anything like that (oh, and i could be and we all know that) but guess what, bitterness isn’t good for me and i’m only doing GOOD THINGS FOR ME. 

when i think about some of you, actually i think about the funny stuff and what i learned to love from you, like Rap, Jazz, Comedy Clubs and the great outdoors. I will always think of some of you when I participate in those things. The not so nice stuff, well, i’ll tuck that away and save it for another blog. 

Some of you are married now, have children, grandchildren, divorced. That’s good that you have moved on in your life. I do not wish you any ill wish. What i do wish is that you found someone who completed you, make you into a better man than you were when I knew you. 

Like most women, I blamed myself for things that went wrong in our relationship(s) but soon i realize that since I wasn’t in a relationship by myself, it takes TWO people to make one and TWO people to screw it up. I accept my responsibility, i’m not going to accept yours. Whether you liked to get me to date you or lied to keep me, it was your lie, not mine. I am not a priest, I can’t absolve you of your sins. And if i were, I can’t honestly say I would. We are who we are. Change, real change comes from within. Whether or not any of you have changed; its not my place to say or even does it matter to me. 

This letter is about me acknowledging that at one point in the timeline of my life, i had feeling for you. Whether for 1 hour or 1 year, You meant something to me. Whether based on a lie or the truth, You mattered to me. It would be unreasonable to deny that. What I will not continue to do is hold my feelings hostage to someone who is unworthy of receiving them. So here’s the deal:

I RELEASE YOU. I RELEASE YOU FROM any promises you made me in the past, in the present, in the future. I release you from my heart, my mind, my soul. I release you from any power you had over me in the past and any contact you make to me to reignite it in the future. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for allowing me to learn from you what love is, what good love is and what good love isn’t. Thank you so much for getting me clear about the direction I want to go in love.

yours always,


something wicked comes this way.

According to my younger brother, i eat men for breakfast. Once my brother, one of his friends and the friend’s brother were at our house playing PlayStation.  The friend’s brother asked my brother about me when i walked out the room. My brother later told me that he didn’t even turn away from the game and said:

“Man, She eats men like you for a snack.”

All i could do was laugh. It wasn’t as if he was lying. When my younger brother was 6, he and another brother would blackmail my dates. I would never understand why my dates would kill themselves to bring my brothers on dates with us, or buy them anything they wanted during the date or bring them back food from various restaurants. I was like, “um, they are good.” but no… my dates would kill themselves to make my brothers happy. It wasn’t until a few years ago my younger brother admitted that they would tell my dates “if we don’t like you, SHE’s not going to go out with you again”, so of course, my dates took their threats seriously.


Being pimped out by a 6 and 14 year old. I don’t know which was worse, the fact that they were good at it or the fact that the guys i dated bought it. Unfortunately, my brothers still have an influence on my dating life. If i am serious about someone and they object… its not good odds for them (the boyfriend). It also helps they live in 2 different states and i rarely introduce them to anyone (HHAHAHA)

As i have talked about in a prior blog, certain things remind me of my ex. I’ve been pretty good at trying to work through my feelings for him (which are definitely not the same as before) but i also know that its the nature of the beast of love.

My dating history is someone like this

(according to my brother)


my college boyfriend

After college boyfriend


late 20’s/30’s dating







the ex



the new guy




i promised myself  i’d behave.  i’d be a kinder, gentler me….


i lied….