hurt ovaries and other birthday gifts

my birthday is coming up. weeks from now. i always get excited this time of year. i have been thinking about what i want. Well, i’m thinking, something old (2000-10 Candy Apple Red Porche 944); something new (a queen size bed) something borrowed (Hugh Jackman: with his wife’s permission of course) something blue: (blue diamond in the Museum of Natural History-Washington, DC)

now i thought about it and its soooo, soooo realize that i’m not going to get anything I want this year. I would really, really, want just one thing on my list, but i’m also very realistic. Hugh Jackman ain’t coming to join me in the new bed. The blue diamond is under lock and key at the Museum of Natural History, and my Porche is sitting in someone’s car lot.

Birthday’s aren’t suppose to be realistic are they? I mean, whatever happened to some damn fairy sprinkling dust over my head while i’m sleep? oh yea, that’s for losing teeth and i’m really trying to keep all my teeth, so that’s a bust.

So here’s what i’m thinking, if i can go thru my mental Rolodex and recall the one or 2 guys who made my ovaries hurt, and invite him to a hotel where i can hopefully on Monday i can go to work, rub my belly and go damn, that was a good birthday.