Gabby, Dwayne and a baby momma: how things can get really real when feelings and rings are involved

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I will admit that i like a happy celebrity couple. I do. As snarky as i can be about love, deep down, i think mutual affinity and ‘witty banter’ (as my friends and I call it) between two couples is a great and wonderful thing to behold. 

The problem I have always had with the ‘general public’ commenting on public relationship (myself included) is that we don’t know the ‘back story’. For example: When word broke of Dwayne Wade’s extremely ugly divorce, his ex wife put there business(his business) OUT THERE. was that really necessary with young kids. Absolutely not. I don’t care if he was sexing sheep, keep it to yourself and the sealed divorce documents. If he’s a celebrity and can’t work and pay you alimony/child support, all your revenge was for naught; he can’t work, you can’t live the life you’ve been accustomed to, everyone is calling you a sheep-fucker behind your back, etc.

Like a bad penny, his ex wife has popped up with all sorts of stunts (like this one)

this is why i believe in million dollar gag orders, but i digress. Whether or not they (Gabby and Dwayne) go together before they were ‘officially’ separated or ‘divorced’  (which took 6 years by the way- and his ex going thru numerous attorneys) No one thought to think about this, He’s a celebrity, She’s a celebrity. Celebrities have events. ALL THE TIME. Most celebrity women are PAID to ‘attend’ events, ALL THE TIME. I have no doubt that they ‘met’ and/or knew each other BEFORE he and his wife separated. Who among us hadn’t met someone while we were dating/with/married to someone else and eventually dated someone we knew when we dated our ex. If that was the case, about 1/2 of the couples should be sued by their exs for “intentional infliction of emotional distress”

 

but back to my point

 

Now, after being sued by her boyfriend’s ‘ex (and the case being dismissed); having 1/2 the general black public thinking you are a ‘home wrecker’ (because they want to believe she ‘took’ him from his wife based on…?); THEN having to watching on TV while your boyfriend says you guys are ‘taking a break’ might just make most women tell you to drop dead. fast.

Now i’m not saying Ms. Union is a saint. Far from it, i’m not sure they exist anyhow, but still, can you imagine what’s it like to find out you are broken up on a talk show? That’s not fun. no matter how you slice it. I’m sure she’s become very attached to his boys and loves them dearly and them her. I can’t imagine the conversation he had with them after that tv appearance. 

Now, we all are adults (if not in maturity, then age) so ‘break’ or not, 

 

USE PROTECTION!!!

 

Its not difficult, its not like its not available. Its not like there are not groupies looking to ‘snatch’ semen any chance they get. So, eventually Mr. Wade and Ms. Union reunite. Good for them. He popped the question. She accepted. 

HURRAY!!!

Then its reported that he fathered a child with a “woman he has known for many years” 

 

OUCH. that’s gotta hurt.

 

for BOTH women involved.

 

There is nothing more painful than having another chick tell you she’s having a baby with your man (been there, not cute at all) Did i stay. Yes, but No i didn’t get 8.4 carats either. He begged me like Keith Sweat. Over and Over. I received all sorts of presents, all sorts of gifts, all sorts of apologies. 

Honestly, I didn’t know what to do. I was beyond mad. I was beyond Hurt. I was beyond everything. He saw the pain in my face and i think the reality of his ‘actions’ really hit home for him. What you do really comes out into the light. The other chick. Oh, that’s so another LONG story. 

Short version. She went from going to have an abortion to not wanting me to be around her child because i would (in her words) “hurt her baby”.

 

I told her, No Sweetheart, after I kick his ass for disrespecting me, I”m going to kick yours for talking shit about me to my face. Your ass kicking will come when you drop that load. I have no reason to kick that gorilla looking soon to be child’s ass. (yea, i’m evil like that)

My ex spent months being hounded by a ‘baby’ that incubated for about 11 months. Every time he tried to talk to me about the situation, what was going on. I was like 

 

and no, he didn’t say a word about me calling his soon to be child a gorilla. I told him. Its YOUR SITUATION, YOU CREATED IT, YOU DEAL WITH IT. And be advised. I’m not babysitting while YOU go to the club. Your child, YOU WATCH IT.

When this ‘miracle’ baby never arrived, he was confused and realized he’s been played. His ‘indiscretion’ torpedoed our relationship. (his past indiscretions didn’t help any) 

Do i empathize with Ms. Union. Absolutely. been there, and while I didn’t have to ‘see’ evidence of my fiancee soon to be husband’s infidelity, She will. DAILY. She will have to deal with it DAILY. While we can all sit back and comment from afar.The evidence of her husband’s ‘break-baby’ will be right there. EVERY DAY. How would ANY WOMAN OR MAN deal with that?

Love isn’t enough.

 

I got a ring too. and a declaration of love and commitment. I also got tested for STD’s too. What did the other chick in my situation get? Not him. Even after we broke up, he didn’t have anything to do with her. (he was in totally confession mode and told me all sorts of stuff i didn’t want to hear after we broke up) Did girlfriend think she was going to get him after we broke up. Yep. Come to find out, she just knew that they would be ‘together’ raising ‘their’ child. Didn’t happen. 

Now if this ‘mystery woman’ knew him for ‘years’ and knew he was seeing Gabby (who in the world didn’t) and decided to ‘slide in’ where she fit in, thinking that she was going to secure a spot. She failed. I’m quite sure that she had feelings for him and once she thought they were ‘taken a break’ it was her opportunity to show how she was a ‘team’ player. Unfortunately, it didn’t work out for Ms. Mystery Woman. 

Yes, she’s going to have all her child’s needs taken care of. But what about her? Oh i’m sure she’s going to get the gated house in the nice neighborhood. But she’s not going to get what his other kids get. HIM. on a daily basis. From sunrise to sunset. His kids with his ex wife, his nephew and any kids with Gabby will be with him 24/7. Is she going to let her child be with them 24/7. Hell no. She wasn’t a surrogate. She was like many men do, she thought with her sex organs instead of her brain. How embarrassing it must be to have given birth/about to give birth and your child’s father proposed to someone else? Not a nice feeling, at all. And i refuse to think that she’s “okay’ with the situation. She’s not. 

Do i think Dwayne will spend the rest of his life trying to make this right with Gabby. Yep. He’s got the money to do so. he’s got the ability (financially and otherwise) to create elaborate gestures of love and devotion to her for the  REST OF GABRIELLE’S and HIS LIFE together. 

Side chicks everywhere should take not. he’s not going to put a ring on YOUR finger. No matter how many babies you pop out, no matter how ride or die you are. While you are sexing him like a porn star, You are NOT going to get the title and all the benefits that come with it. Even if Gabby and Dwayne fight all day long, its apparent, SHE gets the ring, not you. You get a baby, stretch marks and a paid for house. For 18 years. You will always be known as a ‘baby momma’, You will always be looked at suspect by other women (and your friends, don’t front) as suspect with anyone’s man. 

He told you what you wanted to hear. He inferred what you needed to hear to get what he wanted. Men do that (and women too) to get what they want. Any woman who thinks her sex organs have magical powers are deluding herself. A man will like you even care about you but his name, please He’s not wily-nilly about who gets it. You can be the best bottom bitch in the world, doesn’t mean your going to get the name. what you will get if you have a baby with a celebrity is people calling you a gold-digging, half-dressed, hoe. don’t take it personal. Whatever feelings you had for him. Well, i can’t tell you what do to with them, but i can say this. Therapy Helps. Alot. I would recommend it to Gabrielle and Dwayne (if they asked me, and not from T.D. Jakes either) 

God Bless Gabrielle if she stays and I won’t fault her for leaving (at any point in time). No one is perfect. I don’t think perfection is what most people are after in a relationship. Its loyalty and respect. I think Dwayne’s character has taken a hit on both. 

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